A Comedy Thriller Inspired by My Chaotic Life
Have you ever felt like your life is a badly written thriller where the main character—you—has absolutely no clue what’s going on? That was me last week. It started with what I thought was just an innocent travel mishap—one of those “haha, I booked the wrong flight” kind of moments. Except this was less “haha” and more “am I an accidental criminal now?” See, I was supposed to fly to Oslo, Norway, for a much-needed break. Instead, in a spectacular display of my ability to not pay attention, I booked a ticket to Odesa, Ukraine.
Because I let my overworked, under-caffeinated brain trust a sketchy travel deal that seemed too good to be true. Spoiler alert: it was. By the time I realized the mistake, I was already mid-air, halfway through my in-flight coffee, and way too tired to process how bad this was about to get. (For the record, never book flights at 2 AM while running on caffeine and self-doubt.)
So there I was, in a country I never planned to visit, with no hotel booking, zero knowledge of the local language, and a rapidly dying phone. But that wasn’t even the worst part. The real chaos began at baggage claim.
Clue #1: The Mysterious Suitcase
My suitcase never showed up. Instead, after nearly an hour of waiting, a completely unclaimed, identical-looking suitcase was left on the belt. In my exhausted state, I did what any half-delirious traveler would do: I took it, thinking airport mix ups happen all the time.
Big mistake.
Because instead of my clothes and emergency snacks, I found:
A perfectly pressed designer suit (which I absolutely could not afford).
A burner phone (sketchy as hell).
A thick envelope labeled “DO NOT OPEN.”
Obviously, I opened it. Because bad decisions fuel great stories. Inside?
A note that said: “Meet me at midnight. Don’t be late.” 1. At this point, I was convinced: I had accidentally stolen a criminal’s suitcase. 2. 3. I was about to be chased by international spies. I needed another coffee before processing any of this.
Clue #2: The Suspiciously Friendly Stranger
As I sat in a café, attempting to figure out whether I was in danger or just having a very bad day, a man in an expensive coat slid into the seat across from me.
“You’re earlier than expected,” he said, eyeing the suitcase. Now, if Finding Ola taught me anything, it’s that sometimes you just fake confidence and hope for the best. So, I smiled and nodded. “Yeah, well, I like to stay ahead of the game.” What game? No clue. But I was too deep in this mess to admit the truth.
Clue #3: The Phone That Wouldn’t Stop Ringing
Before I could come up with an escape plan, the burner phone in the suitcase started ringing. I had three choices:
1. Answer it and possibly agree to something illegal.
2. Leave the suitcase behind and pretend none of this happened.
3. Keep the suit because, honestly, it looked expensive, and I could use an upgrade.
4. Being the responsible adult that I am, I chose a fourth option: panic, chug my coffee, and Google “how to return a suspicious suitcase without being arrested.”
The Twist I Didn’t See Coming
Before I could make a decision, two men in dark suits entered the café. They spotted me immediately. And they did not look like they were here to discuss my questionable life choices.
My heart pounded. I did what any rational person would do—I grabbed my coffee, stood up… and knocked the suitcase right into their legs.
They barely flinched. One of them sighed. “Wrong one again,” he muttered to his partner. Excuse me?? Before I could demand an explanation, they turned and walked out. Just like that. No threats, no arrests, no dramatic disappearances. I looked around. The man who had been sitting with me? Gone. The suitcase? Still not mine. I did the only logical thing—I left it there, walked away, and promised myself one thing:
Next time, I’m double-checking my destination.